Isn’t it weird when someone tells you something about yourself that’s not true? They’re utterly certain of their assumption, and the more you try to convince them otherwise, the more they seem to dig their heels in.
Beautiful Lies by Lisa Unger
In the story before the above quote, the main character is talking to a close friends mother, who believes she is stressed out and is worried about her and doesn’t accept that she is not.
This resonated with me – I stopped talking to my lil sister for about a year after she had a complete meltdown on me because I wasn’t conforming to the expectations that she had of me. Family, it’s a funny thing. When someone gets mad at another around here, they do their best to drag you through the mud with everyone else – it got seriously intense.
When the universe decides I need a little shake up, it goes all out with it as chaos comes from all corners…I usually like to sit back and enjoy the ride – oh look, it’s a new adventure story!
Here are the facts with maybe a dash of opinion:
-I had just closed my Child Care business and had finished the summer with one family, so money was nonexistent
-My mum and stepdad were so on the verge of divorce, they had actually signed the papers and turned them in.
-The kiddo and I were going to move with mum to a new town as she needs someone close and I’d need help with the kiddo while working-we even had a place all picked out.
-New job, an 1 hour drive there, 12 hours to work, an hour drive home – the hours were easy for me, yet different as they weren’t at home anymore.
-Kiddo was in homeschool, but after the move would have transitioned to public
-Divorce gets thrown out the window yet I still had to move from where I was, so we were squatting at my now happily married parents house
-At the start of all this drama, I of course met a guy because what else can be mixed in there 😂, the last thing I wanted to do was move in with him, he was awesome and all but I was already committed to getting us out of the town we were in.
So I go with the flow, I’m adaptable…just keep on keeping on doing what I can to get to the next episode. And out of left field I get accosted and told I’m a horrible person or need an intervention – and I don’t drink or do drugs, I’m healthy kiddos healthy… so wtf?! 🤣… I’m working too much, sleeping over at above mentioned’s house too much? Seriously….it all made little sense to me.
What upset me the most was that she would not listen to what I had to say – I was doing it wrong and f*** what I had to say, I couldn’t possibly be happy or not have an immediate answer to what came next. To this day I still don’t think she’s bothered to step back and examine “the bigger picture” of the events as they were, which is something she just can’t seem to be able to do. Miss Judgey-McJudgerson. Gets me all riled up just remembering it 😂.
Everyone is different, and we all process life changes in a variety of ways. What works for you isn’t going to work for me. What would make you unhappy doesn’t mean that I am unhappy.
I can honestly say that there is no time in my life that her actions and behavior would have been justified. No, I didn’t know what the future was going to look like, but we were in a safe space and I was adjusting to a new a job in a town I had planned on moving to-seemed pretty straight forward to me. Apparently that wasn’t good enough.
I honestly think that my being unavailable for her anymore was the root cause of the whole ordeal, or she was reflecting her issues onto me. Needless to say, having her significant other call to holler at me while I was on break put me over my limit and I disowned her then and there. The whole ordeal ended with me having to make an on the spot choice in a direction that I didn’t want to go.
R.L. Stine had this to say to Sagittarians….(Twitter thread for RL Stine roasting people with their horrorscope…may have to scroll to find it, WordPress is saying I need permission to embed it so will just share the link)
I say NEVAH!!! 😂 I’ll keep my grudges even unto death.
Nah…we’re okay now but definitely not as close as we used to be.
I’ve learned that it’s best to keep people who always want, don’t actually listen or just plain hurt you at arms length. I call this being Minnesota Nice-smiles and pointless talk with no real feelings or emotions involved. Unfortunate but true or you just keep repeating the same crap over and over.
Life.. it’s messy and I’m not perfect and I would never want to be.
True thoughts from my side of the story, an American Misfit, [she/her/hers/trying to be humanish, maybe]
xoxo
-DH
